Product Description

What happens to a little girl who grows up without a father? Can she ever feel truly loved and fully alive? Does she ever heal--or is she doomed to live a wounded, fragmented life and to pass her wounds down to her own children? Fatherlessness afflicts nearly half the households in America, and it has reached epidemic proportions in the African-American community, with especially devastating consequences for black women. In this powerful book, accomplished journalist Jonetta Rose Barras breaks the code of silence and gives voice to the experiences of America's fatherless women--starting with herself.

Passionate and shockingly frank, Whatever Happened to Daddy's Little Girl? is the first book to explore the plight of America's fatherless daughters from the unique perspective of the African-American community. This brilliant volume gives all fatherless daughters the knowledge that they are not alone and the courage to overcome the hidden pain they have suffered for so long.

Product Details

• Amazon Sales Rank: #993084 in Books
• Published on: 2002-01-29
• Released on: 2002-01-29
• Original language: English
• Binding: Paperback
• 272 pages

From Amazon.com
Passionate and provocative, Whatever Happened to Daddy's Little Girl? explores the impact of fatherlessness on black women from a thoughtful and highly personal perspective. A woman who has herself "lost" three fathers, Jonetta Rose Barras interweaves her own experience of the "fatherless woman syndrome" with those of other fatherless black women, observations by psychologists and sociologists, and research findings. Barras concludes that factors such as the shift to a service economy, the "gender war of the 1970s through the 1990s," and affirmative action and quota policies caused black men to be "kicked to the curbside." Consequently, many black men began to perceive themselves as superfluous to their families, and by 1996, 60 percent of all black children were living in fatherless homes.

While some attention has been given to the impact of fatherlessness upon sons, Barras notes that very little has been paid to the effect on daughters. She powerfully shows the seriousness of this oversight, arguing that fatherless daughters often believe themselves unworthy and unlovable; strongly fear abandonment, rejection, and commitment; possess strong aversions to intimacy or, conversely, act promiscuously; overcompensate in work and relationships or oversaturate with food, alcohol, sex, or drugs; and experience extreme anger, rage, and/or depression. Barras offers suggestions to begin the healing process (on several fronts, for she is concerned too with the related issues of daughterless fathers and broken maternal trust). Perhaps one of the most important means of healing (both individually and societally) is the conversation Barras opens with this significant work. --Stephanie Wickersham

From Publishers Weekly
Integrating a personal narrative with other women's testimonies and research findings with self-help remedies, Barras sheds light on the profound impact fatherlessness can have on black women. In her 30s, Barras learned from her mother that the man she had thought was her father was not. Though stunned by the news, Barras also believed it explained much of the loneliness she endured as a child. She began to try to come to terms with the guilt she felt not only about her father's departure, but about her ruptured relationships with two surrogate fathers, each of whom left her mother while Barras was still a girl. She also recounts her heartrending efforts to mend broken trust with her mother while forging a bond with her own fatherless daughter. The study deepens in subsequent chapters, as Barras intertwines the diverse voices of other black women who grew up without their fathers. Unfortunately, her ambitious effort is marred by overly broad conclusions. She attributes a vast range of dysfunctional behaviors--from promiscuous sexual relationships and a longing for motherhood to the inability to trust and uncontrolled fits of "rage, anger, depression"--to fatherless women. And her reliance on simple solutions at times minimizes the issue's gravity. Her work is stronger when she locates the chasm between black men and women in gender war stereotypes of "good women" and "bad men" and affirmative action policies that have allowed black women upward mobility while moving black men out of the workforce. Her study should stir useful debate. Agent, Victoria Sanders. (May)
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From Library Journal
Like her 1995 work, The Corner Is No Place for Hiding (The Bunny & the Crocodile Pr.), Barras's new book is a brilliant, heartfelt exploration of the human condition, with numerous excellent suggestions for rising above desperation and healing deep personal wounds. Although written from the unique perspective of a fatherless black woman, Barras's investigation of "fatherless woman syndrome" has universal appeal. The Washington Times columnist meticulously describes her spiritual evolution from pain, resentment, and anger to healing, reconciliation, and forgiveness, offering practical, self-efficacious "home remedies." Intimate, loving relationships and "platonic friendships," she believes, can fill the void of fatherlessnessDnot addictive relationships or habits or pretending to be an "Amazon woman." In the spirit of Hope Edelman's Motherless Daughters (LJ 5/1/94), Barras's guide compassionately addresses a social crisisDfatherlessness affects almost 50 percent of American householdsDand is highly recommended for all libraries.
-DChogollah Maroufi, California State Univ., Los Angeles
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Customer Reviews

anti-feminist, overstated claptrap......from a sista!
This is another example of what happens when good articles are extended into poor booklength works. The author's mother said the author's father forced her through a glass window once and yet the author blames her mother and all women with a backbone on fatherlessness in Black America. Daniel Moynihan's 1965 report on the Black family has been attacked by African-American thinkers of both genders, yet Barras hardly sees a problem with it. This book does nothing but blame women for being victims. Like all conservative rants, it blames feminists, rather than sexism for the problems that women have. This could have been an exciting, thoughtful book; instead, the author speaks in hyperbole and sees no problem with being ridiculously one-sided. Further, she's a journalist, not an academic or an author. Thus, not only should the book be seen as amateur, but it's written in an allegorical style that I found silly. This book should not be embraced by the African-American community. As a pro-feminist brotha, I can't understand why a sista would created this misogynistic tool to harm Black single mothers and womanists throughout the nation.

Wonderful Read
I bought this book a few months ago, but finally took the time to read it yesterday. This woman is on to something. The insights she gives to those of us who grew up without fathers, and thought it was perfectly normal--only to find out in the real world, we were limping along in life-are life changing. My dad died when I was 11 months old. When I would ask about him, I got no answers. Combine that with a bitter and scared mother and you have a chronic overachiever who has lost touch with the true spirit of femininity. This is the kind of stuff that breeds mistrust between us and men, and competition amongst women. Ladies, we must commit ourselves to healing. God is the only true healer, and he's been telling us through his word, that this kind of hurt can be healed.

I Never Thought...
I didn't give as much thought as I should have about growing up without a father or reliable father figure. Yet while reading this book, I saw many of my realities on the pages. Regardless of a societies cultural practices, every adult and child has a role to play and when it is compromised or ignored, the social structure falters. That's what Barras was talking about. Every fatherless woman won't have the same experiences, but most must admit that their view of the world is markedly different from women who grew up with positive influences from both parents regardless of their marital status. Clearly some of us adapt better than others, but Barras's theory has merrit.